


And the World Turns

by incandescence



Category: Johnny's Entertainment, Johnny's Jr.
Genre: Angst, M/M, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-14
Updated: 2014-08-14
Packaged: 2018-02-13 03:35:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2135577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/incandescence/pseuds/incandescence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At night Nozawa dreams of warmth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And the World Turns

**Author's Note:**

> In the process of cleaning out my folders. This is something that was written in haste one night a month ago. I don’t remember what my original plan for this story was when I wrote the first few paragraphs way back at the beginning of August. Maybe I didn’t have one, or maybe this was it all along.

At night he dreams of warmth, of almost unintelligible whispers, of strong arms wrapped securely around him, protective, reassuring.

He wakes up to birds chirping outside his window, unfocused eyes immediately falling to the unoccupied space on his bed and a wave of disappointment crashes down on him once again so suddenly he forgets how to breathe.

He’s not okay, but he hasn’t been for a while.

\---

Sometimes he lies wide awake, all hopes of sleep long gone, wondering if he would have done things any differently. The scenarios that play out in his head differ each time, but all lead to the same conclusion.

It’s too much to bear, so he usually gets up to sit by the window, cocooned in blankets, waiting for the sun to rise.

\---

He wonders if he’s a hypocrite. Asking beloved ones to spill their secrets, to let out what’s hurting them - _”You’ll feel better”, “Sometimes it’s good to let things out”_ \- yet his own he keeps locked up tightly, with every intention of never letting them see the sun again. He wonders what others can see in his eyes, or if they see anything at all - sometimes he’s afraid that everything he’s fought so hard to keep inside is reflected in them - eyes being the window to your soul after all - and sometimes he even hopes that they are, but then time keeps moving and the moment passes.

After all, it’s best to keep things hidden.

\---

He knows that people know more than they let on, from the way they tiptoe around him, skirting around the edges of an issue but never getting any further. Part of him wishes they would, because tiptoeing is tiring, but then he doesn’t know what he’d actually say. _”Yes, my heart is broken.”, “No, I’m not better.”, “I think this is for the best.”_ flit through his mind quite often, but he knows it would only make things worse - people don’t like to hear the truth.

So he shoulders the loneliness on his own.

\---

He doesn’t go looking for Sanada.

\---

If it’s meant to be, they’ll find each other again eventually.


End file.
